A has been going to preschool on Tuesdays and Thursdays, just like she did last year. She's really enjoying it and has made a few good friends. Usually on our way home from school we ask her about how her day was, what books they read, what songs they sang and so on. Today we had an interesting exchange:
Us: So what kinds of things did you do today honey?
A: Well, we got to see a fish in the tank. Then our class was going to go outside to see all the pumpkins, but I didn't want to hold Allison's hand.
Us: Oh, why didn't you want to hold Allison's hand honey?
A: I wanted to hold Jacob's hand.
Us: Well, you can't always hold Jacob's hand darling, you need to be friends with other kids too.
A: I had to stay in the office with Miss R and Madison came and took my hat. And I was making a face like this (mad face).
Us: Wait, what happened?
A: Madison came and took my hat because she is a little baby. Miss R took it from her and handed it back to me and I did this (snatching motion).
Us: (Alarmed) Go back to the beginning, tell us what happened. Are you saying that your whole class went outside to see the pumpkins but you had to stay inside because you didn't hold Allison's hand?
A: Yeah, Mrs. B said I had to stay there.
Us: Did Mrs. B tell you to hold Allison's hand?
A: Yeah, but I didn't want to.
Us: So you disobeyed Mrs. B and you had to sit in the office while the other kids went outside to play?
Us: And then a little baby took your hat and Miss R gave it back to you and you snatched it from her (increasing alarm)?
Us: A! That sounds terrible honey, you need to obey your teachers even when they are telling you to do something you don't want to do. You didn't get to go outside because you disobeyed. And snatching something from an adult is not respectful. Do you understand all this?
A: Yeah, don't make that sad face at me. Make a happy face at me.
Us: Are you sorry for disobeying and being disrespectful?
Us: Well, when we go to class on Thursday you are going to need to apologize for what you did today.
And the conversation went on from there. Wow! Our daughter was basically sent to the principal's office in preschool. Great, we have the rebel of the 3 year old class.
The afternoon pretty much went from bad to okay and then to horrible by the end of the day. We are at our wits end today with her. She is so difficult to deal with. She'll go into a tailspin if she doesn't get her way. Hubby and I had to have a long talk tonight to try and figure out what we are doing wrong or where we can improve. We've come up with some areas we can improve on: consistency from us and not answering her so quickly (giving us time to consider her request instead of answering no and then saying yes later because we didn't think about it enough).
Truthfully, I'm not feeling very hopeful on this right now. It's hard to know if it's her age, her personality, or her parents that are to fault.